Adventures with Play

One more

2006-10-29T14:08:00.000-08:00

Ok, I can't stop at just one. Click here for the original (by talented artist Ben Lane) and my doctored version.

I'm gonna need to change my site layout if this sort of thing is going to continue.

Lazy

2006-10-29T12:56:00.000-08:00

Clearly suffering from prolonged comic-block, I've decided to ease my way back into the world of WoW comics by criticizing other, more talented and motivated, people.

First up is "Tales from Westfall", a recent honorable mention from this month's official Blizzard comic contest.

Nice artwork and good premise, but the writing can be punched up a bit. Pointing out the absurdities of game logic is funny, but not as funny as proposing tortured explanations to them. Here's how I would've done it:

Panel 1. Close-up of bloody dwarf.
[Dwarf]: Dammit! I got another boar with no liver!
[Someone yelling from off screen to the left]: What?
[Dwarf]: No liver!
---
Panel 2. Night Elf entering from the left.
[Elf]: You're just fucking eating those, aren't you?
[Dwarf]: What?! No! It didn't have a liver!
[Elf]: How is that even fucking possible?
---
Panel 3.
[Dwarf]: I dunno. Maybe it's like in that "Schrodinger's Cat" thought experiment: You picture a cat, but you don't know if it has a liver or not until you kill him and open him up.
[Elf]: I'm picturing opening you up and finding all the boar livers cause you FUCKING ATE THEM!
---
Panel 4. Human entering from the right.
[Human]: Maybe if you didn't mash the poo out of everything with that comically large hammer, they'd still have livers. Where'd you get that thing anyway?
[Dwarf]: I found it in a bird.

But why does the night elf have to swear?

I'm here, I'm here

2006-07-27T11:57:00.000-07:00

And man, am I embarrassed at the long absence. Thanks much for all the comments and emails! I've been away from WoW and the blog for a bit but am starting up again. New comics as soon as I get my mana refreshed.

I'm alive

2006-06-06T09:48:00.000-07:00

Contrary to popular reports, I am indeed still alive. Sorry for the extended and unexpected absence; a heavy workload in RL (I'm one of the justices on the U.S. Supreme Court - can't tell you which one but, hint: the one that likes robes) is making it hard to play. I'll be back to making the strips by this weekend, caseload permitting.

One Shots 14 - Lore

2006-05-10T18:56:00.000-07:00

[Update: Ok, this one is a bit obscure. Here's the original big announcement from today.]

Half the Battle - 3 - Will of the Forsaken

2006-04-29T17:51:00.000-07:00

What's "Half the Battle" you ask? Why is this one number 3? Did I miss anything?

All is well. I've simply noticed that the "One Shots" category, created to hold miscellaneous strips, was getting a bit crowded and I wanted to do some more "educational" content, so I made this new category and stuffed the previous "Learn 2 Play" Hunter and Mage strips into it. The sidebar on the right has also been expanded with the new navigation options.

Let the learning, err, continue!

Laws

2006-04-28T08:18:00.000-07:00

The new comic will be up later today or tomorrow. Meanwhile, since the talking sheep has stirred up some discussion, let me paraphrase C. P. Snow and summarize the

Three Laws of Warcraftdynamics

1. You can't win (because that guild of 14-year-old-kids has all purple gear, poor parenting).

2. You can't break even (because that next upgrade to your pants is gonna cost you a lot more than the increase to your earnings power that you obtained by getting those last shoulders).

3. You can't even quit the game (because hero classes may come out at some point).

In other words, World of Warcraft is going to beget the heat death of the universe, unless the next patch finally breaks it for good.

Let us pray.

One Shots - 13 - Learn 2 PLAY: Mage

2006-04-22T17:01:00.000-07:00

Here's the first strip made completly on the Mac. What do you think of the new look-n-feel?

I'm not quite sure yet...

It is done

2006-04-19T08:07:00.001-07:00

So I bought Photoshop CS2 for the Mac.

Now I am really committed to this thing - I've gotta make enough comics to pay for the new tools. Oh wait, that might not work.

Drat!

Stick Figure Mac Test

2006-04-15T17:12:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm still screwing around with the new Mac and I still haven't gotten around to buying Photoshop for it. I think I'm going to try some other programs first. Anyone have any experience with Manga Studio? Any other recommendations?

Meanwhile, in case anyone needs reminding about why Adventures with Play is a screenshot comic. I present to you the latest hand-drawn masterpiece showcasing the full gamut of my artistic prowess:

This episode was inspired by a real conversation that a friend of mine had on Maelstrom, however the comic is so godawful that he refuses to have his name associated with it in any way. He has chosen wisely.

AwP will resume production on the PC immediately while I get things sorted out.

Blogger is broken

2006-04-15T15:25:00.000-07:00

Well, blogger seems to have broken the site. I can't post new images and most of the "closeup" pages don't seem to be working. We'll see how long it lasts.

[Update: Seems the custom template that I'd been using for the "closeup" pages no longer works. I'm trying to fix it now, but you might see craziness for now.

An hour and a half later: More or less fixed. Weeee.]

I'm not dead

2006-04-06T21:52:00.000-07:00

But I am trying to deal with something potentially even more debilitating in the short term. You see, I got a Mac. The first Mac I've ever owned. Now I just can't bring myself to go back to my pc-based comics creating environment and I don't have all the tools I need on the Mac yet. Namely Photoshop. Man that thing's expensive.

I will resolve this dilemma soon.

One Shots - 12 - Patchy

2006-03-28T19:59:00.000-08:00

One Shots - 11

2006-03-24T16:13:00.000-08:00

What's in a name?

2006-03-23T10:50:00.000-08:00

In the past, when people used to ask me what my name means, I'd just shrug and tell them that I thought of it while staring at the floor. But yesterday, Maraxxus of Maelstrom forums figured out a much better story.

Quoth he:

"Tile is truly elit."

Very insightful!

In the spirit of subtly alluding to one's true nature by picking a name that's a hidden word spelled backwards, I'm going to name my next character, "Poop."

Vol 6. - "Exposition" - Episode 1

2006-03-22T09:51:00.000-08:00

Wherein some things are explained and others are obfuscated.

Season 2

2006-03-21T14:30:00.000-08:00

I've just returned from vacation. The next volume of Adventures with Play is in production. Weeeee.

Vol. 5 - "A Trick of the Light" - Episode 5

2006-03-08T21:40:00.000-08:00

Exciting? Conclusion

2006-03-07T14:52:00.000-08:00

I'm doing a bit of jet ~~setting~~ sitting this week, but am aiming to get thrilling conclusion to the current Adventures with Play story arc up on the site by tomorrow or Thursday. It may blow your mind.

But probably won't.

Vol. 5 - "A Trick of the Light" - Episode 4

2006-02-28T12:58:00.000-08:00

One Shots - 10 - Learn 2 PLAY: Hunter

2006-02-13T18:11:00.000-08:00

Here's the first in a sporadic series of educational strips designed to illuminate the intricacies of the World of Warcraft.

Vol. 5 - "A Trick of the Light" - Episode 3.5

2006-02-03T19:28:00.000-08:00

How'd you get so smart? Reading.

2006-02-03T08:20:00.000-08:00

Voting on the current poll question has "closed" and a heartwarming 96.1% of you think that this comic strip is not a complete piece of crap and would therefore either definitely (62.6%) or possibly (33.5%) buy an Adventures with Play book. Thanks for the vote of confidence!

Now, all I need is for someone to convince Blizzard to let me publish such a book. Of course, all proceeds would go to the Child's Play charity. So if you just happen to be a kind person in Blizzard's business development, licensing or legal departments (or just know someone who is), drop me a note at:

Here is the poll question for the sake of posterity. You can still vote and/or look at the results, but I'll probably never look at the outcome.

The next poll question, designed to settle a bet, will be up later tonight alongside of the previously promised "half strip".

Vol. 5 - "A Trick of the Light" - Episode 3

2006-02-02T21:37:00.000-08:00

This episode is inspired by a real Alterac Valley motivational shout made on Maelstrom by a player with the best RP name ever: Steve.

I like italics

2006-02-02T09:21:00.000-08:00

Sorry for the unexpected lag in putting up new comic strips this past week. Between RL and AV, I just haven't been able to find the time to be, how do you say it, funny. Also, I may have lost my Blogger password. Anyway, a new strip will be up tonight and, because I've kept my readers unjustly waiting for so long, a first-time-ever special half strip will be up the very next day. All this at no additional cost to you!

Also, I originally planned for Adventures with Play to run for five volumes and then abruptly end so I could retire to enjoy the ill-gotten spoils. I now realize that I cannot support myself on $0, so AwP will continue past volume 5. There will, however, be a cliff hanger ending to the current volume. Well, there won't be any cliffs, and mostly likely no hanging and, as I've just said, no real ending. Lets just say I haven't written it yet but the suspense may kill you.

Unexpected traffic

2006-01-18T12:38:00.000-08:00

Over the past week or so, I've noticed that some people are putting a link to Adventures with Play in their forum signatures on worldofwarcraft.com and other sites. This completely spontaneous and unprompted act of generosity is greatly appreciated! Thanks much to Azlana, Brittainy, Brughe, Darkslayer, Defazer, Faeton, Genjisan, Hhallahh, Hui, Kavek, Kestrelmas, LostSoldier, Sten, and Vech. My referrer logs only go back a couple of days, so if I missed you: sorry and thanks!

Vol. 5 - "A Trick of the Light" - Episode 2

2006-01-14T13:24:00.000-08:00

Back to complex

2006-01-12T10:05:00.000-08:00

The latest "Just the Punchlines" strip has stirred up quite a bit of discussion in the comments section. I particularly like the interpretation offered by "geechorama". The next, regular, strip will be up soon. Maybe even tonight if I can squeeze in the time to "draw" it.

One Shots - 9 - Simplify. Simplify. Simplify.

2006-01-09T20:26:00.000-08:00

I've seen a few comments on the forums that there is too much text in my comic strips. Always eager to give the people what they want, here are the next two months of Adventures with Play condensed into an EZ-READ format:

Vol. 5 - "A Trick of the Light" - Episode 1

2006-01-04T19:05:00.000-08:00

In which our protagonist is forced to squint.

We now return to our main story arc, already in progress. If you've forgotten what's what, you can start at the beginning of it all.

Happy New Year!

2006-01-03T21:26:00.000-08:00

I'm back, and I brought presents. Well, not really presents. New comics starting tomorrow!

One Shots - 8 - "Christmas in Azeroth"

2005-12-25T20:15:00.000-08:00

Silver

2005-12-22T10:46:00.000-08:00

Thanks to all your clicking, Adventures with Play is now listed as a silver sponsor on Child's Play.

One Shots - 7 - "A Delicate Request"

2005-12-20T09:01:00.000-08:00

Ooooh

2005-12-18T17:57:00.000-08:00

I just noticed that by clicking on the "Advertise on this site" link at the bottom of my ads, you can create Google ads that appear specifically on Adventures with Play. Try it!

I said, try it.

Switching Charities

2005-12-18T14:40:00.000-08:00

I've decided that Child's Play, the charity started by the godfathers of webcomix over at Penny Arcade is a better recipient of your click-derived donations than the scandal-prone and insufficiently-video-game-affiliated American Red Cross. From now on, 100% of the revenue from this site will go to Child's Play. Now you can check the sidebar to see just how little money your lackadaisical clicking on WoW gold and eyelash straighter ads brings to sick children everywhere. Well, just the English- and French Canadian- speaking parts of everywhere if this map is to be believed.

Oh, and if you only clicked on those ads to benefit the Red Cross, put away your indignant emails. I've just settled up with both organizations for the full amount as of today. Now if I can just con Google into sending me a duplicate adWords check, I'll be back on the dotcom gravy train.

Choo choo.

One Shots - 6

2005-12-17T12:13:00.000-08:00

The next stage of media empire

2005-12-13T10:17:00.000-08:00

So I'm thinking of printing a physical comic book with some Adventures with Play strips and other sundry content. It might be fun to do. What do you think? To the sidebar poll question!

The High Brows have it

2005-12-13T09:49:00.000-08:00

The third poll question is now closed and "High Brow" has won by a hair's breadth.

42.1% of you say that you prefer thoughtful comix about the human condition. Something along the lines of Descartes' "Meditation on a Ball of Wax."
41.8% prefer the weird stuff; "Meditation on a Ball of Mayonnaise" comes to mind.
Only 16.1% of you go for the peasant humor. Rename the last strip to, "Meditation on a Ball of Poop" and consider it your consolation prize.

Here is the poll question for posterity. You may continue voting on it, but your votes will no longer be legally binding.

The next poll question will be up shortly!

One Shots - 5

2005-12-11T17:02:00.000-08:00

A new low for Adventures with Play.

If it bends...

2005-12-09T13:06:00.000-08:00

There's an interesting discussion on the nature of comedy developing in the comments section of the inaugural strip. What do you think?

Life Imitates Timesink

2005-12-08T11:58:00.000-08:00

Some Kingsblood has spawned outside my office. Unfortunately, I no longer remember how to pick it.

Volume 4 is complete

2005-12-07T09:09:00.000-08:00

The latest episode wraps up Volume 4 - "Shepherds". As always, you can view the whole volume on one page by clicking here. If you're new to this humble narration, I recommend starting Adventures with Play at the very beginning and clicking on "Next". That way, you can experience the epic story telling in all its alleged majesty!

Volume 5 - "A Trick of the Light" and the next "One Shots" will be starting production real soon now.

Vol. 4 - "Shepherds" - Episode 5

2005-12-04T18:51:00.000-08:00

Vol. 4 - "Shepherds" - Episode 4

2005-11-30T21:00:00.000-08:00

The people keep speaking

2005-11-29T10:00:00.000-08:00

Voting in the current sidebar poll continues to be heated with "High brow" and "unibrow" running neck and neck. Thanks to everyone who voted. The next strip will be up later tonight.

Vol. 4 - "Shepherds" - Episode 3

2005-11-19T19:45:00.000-08:00

While the sidebar voting boils in a virtual dead heat, we return to volume 4, already in progress.

Take the high road

2005-11-18T10:48:00.000-08:00

It looks like the strong cautionary tale below has had the intended effect of swaying the current sidebar voting. "Unibrow" was solidly in the lead when I put up the warning strip, but now "High Brow" is way in front. Readers of mine, you are wise beyond your years.

There's still time to vote. A new strip will be up this weekend.

You asked for it...

2005-11-15T07:38:00.000-08:00

Now regret your decision!

There's still time to limit the damage. Vote in the sidebar poll today!

Now is the time on Sprockets when we poll

2005-11-14T07:58:00.000-08:00

To the sidebar! Your chance to influence the direction of future Adventures with Play strips is at hand once again. Please vote on question #3.

The old poll question and results are presented below, for hysterical raisins. You can still vote in it if you enjoy throwing your vote away.

One Shots - 4

2005-11-13T08:59:00.000-08:00

I knew it would come to this

2005-11-11T08:18:00.000-08:00

Looking through the referrer logs to this site (those are the links people used to get here), I found this one.

I'm guessing that somebody in Japan didn't find what they were looking for on Adventures with Play. Sorry, dude.

Rejoice

2005-11-11T06:22:00.000-08:00

I'm back from an extended sojourn through the world. More hi-larious comix are forthcoming.

Vol. 4 - "Shepherds" - Episode 2

2005-10-27T06:06:00.000-07:00

Exciting new navigation options

2005-10-26T20:05:00.000-07:00

I continue to pwn Blogger for the convenience of my readers. At the bottom of every strip close-up, you'll now find navigation links to the close-up versions of the previous and next comics. This way, you can go through all the strips in their full-rez, scr33n pwning, chronologically ordered glory with a minimum of interruptions. Try it by going to the first strip, scrolling to the bottom and methodically walking back and forth through the entire collection 57 times. If that sounds boring, just pretend you're farming for Arcanite!

You might have to Shift-Reload every page that you've already seen to get the new navigation options to show up for the first time. Or just clear your browser cache. Or just get a new computer. N00b.

The next strip, episode 2 of volume 4 will be up - ahead of schedule - tomorrow morning. It will be a very special episode.

Vol. 4 - "Shepherds" - Episode 1

2005-10-24T19:43:00.000-07:00

Wherein those who should know, don't.

Unexpected Break

2005-10-24T10:46:00.000-07:00

Adventures with Play has been on an unexpected hiatus as I catch up with real life, but production of the strips will resume this week. Thanks to all for making the last "One Shots" the most popular strip yet!

One Shots - 3

2005-10-17T21:12:00.000-07:00

Another One Shots?

2005-10-13T21:25:00.000-07:00

With the latest "One Shots" strip, the humor in Adventures with Play has officially reached a new low. I'm trying to find the level of the room, as they say in the biz. Volume four of the regularly scheduled series will start next week after one more low-brow "One Shots", methinks.

On the up side, I just got a shipment of most of the items from our store. Full reviews are forthcoming.

One Shots - 2

2005-10-12T16:10:00.000-07:00

Adventures with Play committed to losing money in style

2005-10-10T17:36:00.000-07:00

As I previously said, part of the fun of running this site is playing around with new things. The Google ads and the AwP store are two examples of this. I like watching the ad behavior, and designing hokey products that no one is likely to buy is a hoot. Of course, the money that these things bring in is miniscule; I've made a whopping $66.04 on the ads and the store revenue stands at a nice, round 0.

On top of all that, I'm not overly fond of some of things advertised on my site. Do I really want my readers to buy (in pig latin, so as to not further encourage the ad robots) "Orldway ofway Arcraftway Oldgay" or "owerpay evelinglay ervicessay"? No sir, I do not!

So how do I karmically reconcile the short money and the questionable ads to the sheer fun of monkeying around with this stuff? Easy: I'm going to give all the revenue away.

So from now on, every penny Adventures with Play makes will be donated to the American Red Cross National Disaster Relief Fund. I'll also keep a periodically updated counter on the sidebar showing how much money has been "collected" so far. I'll kick in the first $100 so the amount isn't quite as puny as it would otherwise be.

So now, whenever someone buys those Angry Dwarf Boxers or clicks on an oldgay ad, we'll both feel vaguely better about it.

Legal Disclaimer

2005-10-08T14:56:00.000-07:00

The comic strips and other content on this site is Copyright © 2005 Tile. Tile is a fake name for a real person. All rights are reserved.

Much of the material for the comics comes from staged and edited screenshots from World of Warcraft. World of Warcraft is copyrighted, trademarked and otherwise owned top to bottom by Blizzard Entertainment. This site has nothing to do with Blizzard. Blizzard doesn't endorse or produce any of the content. Nothing on this site or the associated comics is in any way designed to impinge on Blizzards rights to World of Warcraft.

Word.

Vol. 3 - "Hooked" - Episode 5

2005-10-08T08:15:00.000-07:00

The conclusion to Volume 3 is the most scr33n pwning357 episode yet.

Another childhood dream fulfilled

2005-10-06T19:16:00.000-07:00

God, I love the Internet.

During my strange childhood, I'd always wanted to do just two simple things: to draw a comic and to write product descriptions for a mail-order catalog (my role model for both was Jarvis). A lack of talent and motivation had always quashed these childhood dreams, but no more! What World of War craft and Photoshop have done for my comic-making-prowess, CafePress has now accomplished for my pecuniary ambitions.

Introducing the Adventures with Play online store!

Are these products any good? I have no idea. I just ordered one of each so I guess we'll know in 3 - 5 business days. Is anyone gonna buy them? Stranger things have happened, but what's really important is that I got to write the descriptions for real products that somebody could actually order. Wheeeee.

[Update: New items and prices!]

Vol. 3 - "Hooked" - Episode 4

2005-10-05T19:51:00.000-07:00

Hero Classes falling off the edge

2005-10-04T21:22:00.000-07:00

In browsing though the stats for this site, I noticed that my "Hero Class Secrets" post from a month ago is one of the most popularly linked-to pages. That makes sense; there's no ugly comic on it.

Anyhoo, I couldn't help but also notice that the post itself is about to fall off the bottom edge of the home page. Where does it go after that? I dunno, maybe the archives or something, but I've never clicked there myself. So from now on, a link to the Hero Class post will live on the right-side nav bar. Eventually, it will be joined by other links in an "Adventures with Play Greatest Hits" section. For now it will be lonely, waiting for other hits to become sufficiently great.

The most important vote you'll ever pwn

2005-10-03T15:20:00.000-07:00

All Adventures with Play strips are made by taking World of Warcraft screenshots, fading out the background behind the main actors, adding thousand-monkeys-on-a-typewriter style dialogue and doing some post-processing. I've been experimenting with different levels of background fade and am still trying to figure out the right balance.

A heavy amount of fade (for example in Vol.2 Ep. 3) really pops the characters visually while evoking the ennui that you should rightfully feel after playing the game for sixteen hours straight. A light amount of fade (for example in Vol.3 Ep. 3), preserves more of the colors and feel of the game. Help me decide how much fade is just right by voting in the new poll. To the sidebar!

Update: My free poll-hosting service seems to be going up and down randomly. Oh well.

Vol. 3 - "Hooked" - Episode 3

2005-10-01T20:45:00.000-07:00

The people have spoken

2005-09-30T07:55:00.000-07:00

52% of you like the manly sc33n-pwning "horizontal" layout for the strips. 41.7% of you prefer the dainty "vertical" layout. 6.3% of you have the artistic appreciation abilities of a partially-eaten turnip.

Vol. 3 - "Hooked" - Episode 2

2005-09-26T05:53:00.000-07:00

Pwn the Vote!

2005-09-23T16:06:00.000-07:00

Vote for your favorite comic strip format. I need to know. Nothing less than the fate of the ~~children~~ next episode is at stake! See the sidebar.

Update: Now that there's a new sidebar question, here's the original.

What's this "One Shots" dealie?

2005-09-22T13:47:00.000-07:00

Adventures with Play has become much more plot driven than I originally anticipated, so I thought I'd try making some extra-canonical strips that exist outside the main story arc. I also wanted to experiment with a simpler, vertical layout that isn't quite as scr33n pwning as the horizontal layout I was using before. That's the deal with the comic strip below.

For the record, this is a retelling of the first joke I ever heard in my life. I was five, and it was about Soviet Army generals, but, funnily enough, it still started with, "So a guy walks into a brains store..."

One Shots - 1

2005-09-22T07:10:00.000-07:00

Vol. 3 - "Hooked" - Episode 1

2005-09-19T20:38:00.000-07:00

Those awkward teenage years

2005-09-18T17:01:00.000-07:00

So I thought I'd try rolling a character on one of those new PVPRP servers that went live last week, just to see what a fresh economy looks like. Instead, I was reminded of what low-level characters look like. Here's my 12th level undead mage decked out in his "campy TV-show Robin got locked in the bat cave for 20 years" finery:

Red blouse, Speedos, knee-high boots and baby blue cape. I even managed to dress better in junior high school in real life. Just barely, but still.

Also, I'm not sure how well I'm going to adjust to having to roleplay on the public channels. Here's an excerpt:

[1. General] [Someguy1]: My fell brothers, where can I learn engineering and skinning?
[1. General] [Someguy2]: UC
[1. General] [Someguy1]: UC?
[1. General] [Me]: University of California
[1. General] [Someguy3]: Hey, that bastard's not roleplaying! Kill him!
[1. General] [Me]: err, um, i mean, braaaaaaains, braaaaaaains

For your reading pleasure

2005-09-16T14:36:00.000-07:00

Like nursing a bottle of cheap Tijuana tequila, enjoying Adventures with Play is best done from beginning to end. That's why from now on, you'll be able to read a complete volume of strips in chronological order without any pesky intermediate clicking or commercial interruptions. Reading the strips like this will make you appreciate the nuanced interconnectivity of AwP's storytelling design. It'll also pwn ur scr33n real bad.

Here's the complete Volume 1
Here's the complete Volume 2

For future convenience, these links will also be available from the right hand navbar.

Volume 3, "Hooked" starts filming this weekend.

Vol. 2 - "Matters of the Heart and the Head" - Episode 5

2005-09-15T07:22:00.000-07:00

Vol. 2 - "Matters of the Heart and the Head" - Episode 4

2005-09-12T04:51:00.000-07:00

Our Robot Overlords

2005-09-10T09:44:00.000-07:00

Even though Adventures with Play the comic strip is set in the swords-and-sandals fantasy genre of World of Warcraft, Adventures with Play the website is all about fighting robots. Miserly ad robots determine how much money I earn from your eyeballs and clicky-fingers. Tireless index bots figure out if my site is worth finding on search engines. Graffiti-spraying spam bots slither through every cranny, seeking any opportunity to inform my readers about weight loss plans and anime porn. It doesn't even matter if AwP readers don't care about dieting, the spam bots are fighting the index bots and this humble site is just a tragic, pock-marked battlefield.

Of course the worst robots of all are the nefarious email harvesters. They skulk through every letter on this site looking to pluck an innocent email address from the text and sell its still-squirming soul to the spammers and the phishers and the IRS.

Some of these robots can be reasoned with, as long as you speak clearly and make no sudden movements. I posted a letter to the Google ad bots which seems to have been fairly effective. To see it, click on any of the comic strips to bring up the full-size version and scroll to the bottom of the page. Use this link if you're too lazy to scroll down to a comic. Cherish that laziness! To paraphrase my uncle, "You'll work when you're a robot!"

The spam bots and mail harvesters, however, must be fought tooth and nail. That's why you need to enter a captcha (or "word verification" as Yahoo calls it) to post a comment here, and why, if you want to email me, you'll have to use your human eyeballs and fingers and send mail to:

And if a robot ever asks to borrow your eyeballs, run.

Vol. 2 - "Matters of the Heart and the Head" - Episode 3

2005-09-09T05:49:00.000-07:00

Stinging Criticism

2005-09-08T06:46:00.000-07:00

A fan writes about these strips:

why do so many people like these terrible unfunny pieces of crap? i mean if you actually drew it i could at least respect the effort put into it. but this just sucks

Touché! The reason that I don't actually draw the strips is pretty obvious. I can't actually draw. Here is how a classic Adventures with Play moment would have appeared had I tried to draw it:

I think we all agree that no one needs to see that. That's why I'm forced to use screenshots.

Likewise, I can't actually shoot magical missiles out of my hands, ride a purple-eyed warhorse through a plague-ravaged wilderness or turn angry people into sheep. That's why I'm forced to use a video game. I thought I did all three of those things in college, but I'm probably misremembering.

Thanks to everyone that helped with the shoot last night!

Fame

2005-09-07T13:41:00.000-07:00

Hey, Blizzard put me on the front page of www.worldofwarcraft.com, in the Community Spotlight section. Unfortunately, they linked directly to a jpeg, so there's no easy way for clickers to get back here. Still, this started a lively discussion in the official forums, where I am currently being accused of having no talent. That's funny cause it's true!

I'll be shooting the exciting conclusion to volume 2 of the strip tonight, so if you want to be famous and have a character on the Alliance side of Uther, send me a tell at around 7 pm pacific time. You must be tall enough to get to the Eastern Plaguelands. Fame not guaranteed.

In biblical news, my Wacom tablet finally showed up so I'm now half as cool as Moses. What I lack in talent I make up for in unnecessary gadgets.

Vol. 2 - "Matters of the Heart and the Head" - Episode 2

2005-09-07T06:42:00.000-07:00

Attention to details

2005-09-06T11:46:00.000-07:00

So I always thought that the quote was, "There but by the grace of god go I", but snooty know-it-all Google claims that it's, "There but for...", which is derived from the full quote, "There but for the grace of God goes John Bradford". Apparently this was uttered by a guy named John Bradford, which makes some sense. It's a good thing that I do such extensive historical research for the comic; misquoting John Bradford just won't do! Anyhoo, not only does "there but by" scan better than "there but for", it neatly sidesteps the klassic komedy pitfall, "What's a Butfor?" I would totally pwn Bradford in any quote-writing slam.

On related news: I've now made $2.18 from the ads on this site while spending $25 on a Flickr Pro subscription and $320 for a professional graphics tablet (that lasso tool doesn't lasso itself, you know!), so as you can see, I'm already ahead. The dotcom economy marches forward.

The next strip will be up tomorrow.

Alright

2005-09-05T12:37:00.000-07:00

This photo-shrinking business has got to stop. The latest strip is neigh-unreadable on blogger. I'll have to investigate other options.

Update: The full-rez files are all linked through to Flickr now, which solves the problem for the time-being. Don't forget to view the images in full-rez (you might have to click on it once it loads to "zoom-in"). Remember our motto:

"These comix are large and will pwn your scr33n!"

Vol. 2 - "Matters of the Heart and the Head" - Episode 1

2005-09-05T12:03:00.000-07:00

Hero Class Secrets

2005-09-04T20:02:00.000-07:00

The second volume of the comic - "Matters of the Heart and the Head" will start next week. Meanwhile, here's top-secret leaked information about the Hero Class system that Blizzard will be putting into World of Warcraft with the upcoming expansion pack. Many Bothans died to...err, wrong game.

Mage --> Super Water Boy
You can produce highly efficient mana regeneration water, but you have to drink a beer for every stack. Don't ask.

Hunter --> Wall Hugger
You can only travel while maintaining contact with a wall, but nothing will ever aggro on you. You gain a new ability, "Feign Combat" which makes your party members see you as fighting even though you've been sitting and drinking for the past 30 seconds. You can finally use training points to teach your pet bear to dance, which is useful when panhandling in Ironforge.

Rogue --> Ninja Looter
When in a group or raid, you get a five second head start to loot any freshly-killed mob. You are flagged for free-for-all PvP during this time.

Warrior --> Ultimate Tank
You draw all aggro in a fight and have 90% damage mitigation. However, you are unable to cause any damage and cannot move. Warlocks must constantly summon you into place.

Shaman --> Bean Eater
You gain a powerful AoE attack that deals nature damage to all enemy and friendly targets within range, however you have absolutely no control over when it procs.

Paladin --> Army of One
You get every shaman ability, mage teleports, and hunter guns. Now you truly no longer need anyone, which is good because no one wants to group with you either; you lose the ability to join parties. You no longer need an internet connection to play the game.

Druid --> Secret Gardner
You get a brand new zone, called "[Your Name]-glade" created on your server just for your character! You can teleport to this zone by lying down anywhere in the game and staying perfectly still for 20 minutes. While in your special zone, you can cultivate herbs and interact with the many non-aggressive woodland critters. You also gain the ability to transform into a manatee which boosts your faction standing with pirates by 60%.

Warlock --> Best Friend
You can transport players, prevent party wipes, repair equipment, summon pack-mules and hold onto extra quests (for sharing). Other players can equip you as a trinket to increase their mounted movement rate by 3%. Once every 10 minutes, you can be licked for a random beneficial potion effect. You are very useful.

Priest --> Shadow Priest
You can heal the entire party while doing damage at the same time, you have the damage mitigation of a tank, and you gain many powerful offensive capabilities. Oh wait.

Vol. 1 - "Story Thread" - Episode 5

2005-09-03T12:58:00.000-07:00

The robe saga will conclude

2005-09-02T20:27:00.000-07:00

My friends have very generously fed me enough materials to finally make that robe, just in time to create the fifth, and last, episode on this topic.

Comments are back on but now you'll need to enter one of them captchas to post. Also, Blogger seems to be shrinking my full-rez comics without telling me. If I had any artistic integrity, it would be riled by this.

Vol. 1 - "Story Thread" - Episode 4

2005-09-02T14:02:00.000-07:00

Discuss amongst yourselves

2005-09-01T13:39:00.000-07:00

There's a pretty good thread about the first three episodes on the World of Warcraft forums here. With about 1,400 hits in the first two hours of operation, this is going to be bigger then any legitimate thing I've ever done. Oh wait, I've never done anything legitimate.

Holy crap!

2005-09-01T11:27:00.000-07:00

The blog had been live for nine minutes before getting the first two pieces of comment spam. So much for unregistered comments.

Needless to say

2005-09-01T10:59:00.000-07:00

None of this will be funny to you unless you've wasted much time on World of Warcraft. Consider yourself lucky.

Vol. 1 - "Story Thread" - Episode 3

2005-09-01T10:54:00.000-07:00

Vol. 1 - "Story Thread" - Episode 2

2005-09-01T10:52:00.000-07:00

Vol. 1 - "Story Thread" - Episode 1

2005-09-01T10:51:00.000-07:00

Warning!

2005-09-01T10:49:00.000-07:00

These comix are large and will pwn your scr33n! Make sure you view them at full rez.